Hypoglycemia

I never feel good anymore. It's like I'm always sick. It's so frustrating. I blamed it on medication and stress, but I took a break from both and I still felt awful. So, I've been trying to figure out what's causing it.
I finally talked to one of my friends last week and she reminded me that I'm hypoglycemic. Oh ya, I totally forgot! Honestly, I don't know anything about hypoglycemia except for the fact that it means I have low blood sugar levels.
She also has hypoglycemia and told me that I need to do some research. She says it can be a pretty intense disease and needs to be managed or else it can really mess things up. Usually when a doctor diagnoses LBS they try to educate and help you correct it as much as possible. You can't cure it, but you can control it so that the symptoms aren't as bad. Well, when I was diagnosed it was by accident. The doctors were actually looking for neurological and cardiovascular problems and so they didn't really care about the hypoglycemia.
But I've finally started looking into it a little and I'm freaking out because I haven't been taking care of it and I've probably made it worse now. And not to mention, if it's not controlled it can turn into diabetes within a few years. Aahh! I don't want diabetes!! I have relatives with it and I really really don't want it.
I went and got a book from the library and I've been doing some research on the internet, and so I'll have to tell you about it when I'm done. But so far it looks like I'm going to be making some major and I mean MAJOR lifestyle changes. oh boy, an intense lifetime diet is on its way. This is like the worst thing that could happen to a sweet-tooth sugarholic like me! lol. see you soon!

oops!

So, I kinda fell off the face of the earth with this blog huh?! sorry guys! Well, I'm here and I'm alive. But I did fail the diet. I was going to get on here and tell you about it, but I didn't. Sometimes I'm just not very good at this whole blogging deal. But I promise to do better.
Due to my self-analyzing ways I had to look back on my diet and decide whether it was the diet's fault or mine. Both. Here are my reasons (excuses):
1. I tried to be sneaky and go around the rules this time. I ate way too many nuts!!! I was like a little squirrel just munching away. Nuts are super healthy for you, and they are great to eat... in a small portion. I did not portion them. And I was eating the wrong kind. I was eating salted, roasted cashews. Fat fat fat. When you roast a nut it changes the fats into bad fats. And when you eat that much salt you retain water and increase your blood pressure. And cashews are the fatty nut anyway (p.s. that's why they are most people's favorite. p.p.s people tend to like the taste of fat). Because I was eating so many nuts I actually gained weight instead of losing weight. It was completely discouraging and contradictory.
2. I was under attack by my body. It was that time of the month... again! I had it twice in one month. And I had them with only a week break in between. My hormones and thus my cravings were through the roof! Oh, and not to mention my emotions were too. I'm an emotional eater. I've had to face this terrible fact, and I hate it! It ruins me because I'm a very emotional person (not emo though). And because my body was so off I was really sick. My stomach ached and I felt nauseous. I finally caved and ate some crackers to soothe it.
3. Last week was a high-stress week. When I'm stressed I eat. It's a bad habit. It's one I'm working on. At least I've realized it and can admit it. Too much was going on in my personal life last week and I ended up dealing with it the wrong way.. eating.
So, what have I learned? I need a new plan. I need a plan I can stick to. I need one that is more of a permanent lifestyle change. I need to learn portion-control. But working out everyday feels great! We'll get this figured out soon enough...

Day 3.. err.. Day 2

Okie dok, so today is actually my third day of the diet, but where I took my free day already I am just gonna say it is my second because it is only my second day dieting. I was gonna get on here and update you yesterday, but I ran out of time. Sorry. But I am here now and that's all that matters. lol.
Yesterday was the big weigh in day. So here goes nothing:
Weight: 134.4 lbs
Body Fat: 27.7%
Muscle: 51.4 lbs
Water: 53.0%
BMI: 22.9
At least I'm below 135 again. That's good news. Not what I want to be at, but good news nonetheless. My body fat percentage is GROSS! That is so sickening! That is the one number I want to change more than any of the others. Hopefully, the muscle poundage is good because I really don't know what it's supposed to be at. And my water is perfect! Your water should be in the range of 50-55%. And my BMI is at a "healthy" level, but it's still too close to the border. It needs to go down. I also measured myself. Ugh...
Upper Arm: 10.5 in
Chest: 34 in
Waist: 32.5 in
Hips: 37 in
Thigh: 23 in
Calf: 14 in
I have more detailed measurements in my journal, but that is just to give you an idea. I take measurements for both my right and left sides because believe it or not they do differ. Sorry to make you feel self-conscious, but we are not perfectly symmetrical. Depending on which side is more dominant determines which muscle is bigger. Crazy huh?! And all the measurements posted are taken from the widest point. I never quite know where to measure for my waist and hips, so I just measured at my belly-button and underwear line. I actually have 3 different locations for my waist measurement and two for my hips in my personal journal. Just so I'm a little more accurate. lol.
The good news is I'm pear-shaped, so I'm healthy. YaY! But my waist is almost as big as my chest! NOO!!! That must change immediately! This is why I hate my body.. if you notice my waist, chest, and hips are almost all the same. Grr!! That's why I'm a box! I don't have that sexy curvacious body that guys like. My ribs are just too wide! I can't get those sides that slope in like all the models have. My sides always just go straight down. Even back when I was a twig and exercised like crazy they still refused to curve. Sorry, but I had to vent for a minute.
Ok, so yesterday I struggled. I wanted bad carbs so much! It was killing me. Nothing was satisfying me, and so I kept eating! I kind of expected this, so I wasn't too shocked.
Around 4pm I finally decided it was time to exercise and went downstairs to do a movie. And that's when they found me!! Those stupid stupid tortilla chips were sitting next to the couch! Ahhh! I almost caved in. I just wanted them so bad! But you should be proud of me! I said no, picked them up, closed them, put them in the windowsill, and then threw in my movie!! I didn't eat a single one! Hoorah! But the movie killed me. lol. I did the Biggest Loser's Bootcamp Workout for Weeks 3-4 with 8lb weights. Holy Cow! I was dying and I mean dying! Haha. But I survived, and I was so relieved when it was over!
But here's my greatest battle: late night cravings. They get me every time. Mine are absolutely terrible! That's when I do most of my eating. No matter how good I've done that day I usually blow it at night. Like I did last night. I ate so much! None of it was from the restricted list, but still! Grr Caraline! Don't Do It! This is going to be a future commitment, but right now it's just a struggle.

Today when I jumped on the scale I was 134.6. I expected this. I ate some pretty heavy foods last night around midnight. Tisk Tisk! But at least it wasn't a huge gain. But it's not what I want. I'm doing bettter with my cravings today. Maybe I really can pull this off!!?? Wish me luck! I'm off to battle (a.k.a. exercise). lol. See you on the scales!

Commitment #2

I don't want to just lose weight. I want to get in shape! So, my second commitment is to exercise daily. My goal is to exercise for 30min every single day! I don't want to bulk up or anything. I just don't want to be flabby. I want to have a nice sexy tone... and flat abs!
During the week I'll try to do more intense exercises, but Sundays may just be more like a walk. And I still have to exercise on my free days!
I know somedays it's just impossible to fit it in, but I'm going to do my best! Even if I can't do the full 30 I will still do whatever I can. And if I miss a day I'm not going to get discouraged, beat myself up, and binge like I usually do. No, instead I'll just relax and do my best the next day.
I'm hoping that this fitness plan will be more of a lifestyle change. I hope to rid myself of my bad and self-destructive habits, and replace them with positive ones.
I worked out a few days last week and boy have I been sore!! Holy cow! Back when I worked out for 3 hours a day I was never this sore! I am so out of shape! It's kind of discouraging because I can't do what I used to be able to do. Sad! But that's ok because the fact that I've been so sore is very encouraging!! It shows great improvement! It means I'm using muscles that I haven't used in a long time! YaY! I am now on my way to a better body!
Saturday, August 1: 10 Minute Flat Abs movie, and The Biggest Winner movie
Sunday, August 2: 30 minute walk

The Beginning. Commitment #1

ok, so I decided that it is time to get serious about getting in shape! And I figured what better way than making a public commitment! That way I can't back out of it and I can't cheese it. So, here is my commitment to you... I am going to get fit and I am going to take you every step of the way! And I think you should join me because I really would have to get completely serious about it!
I am starting today, but I already took my free day for the week, so technically I'm starting tomorrow. lol. Now you may be asking, "What is a free day?" I have to reward myself, so one day a week I get a free day to eat whatever I want... ok, not quite whatever. I can't go and binge 9,000 calories or something. lol. It's just a day where I can treat myself a little. And it can be any day I choose.
Ok, so here's the embarrassing part.. I have to post my measurements. Noo! But this will be beneficial, so I can really see the progress. But I think I'm going to make it every monday. So, tomorrow I better pray I'm skinny, so I don'e humiliate myself. jk jk.
But I'm gonna keep track for the entire month of August. So far I have exercised some, but I've eaten absolutely terrible.
Saturday, August 1: 138 lbs. Aagghh!! That is the scariest number I've seen in a long time!
Sunday, August 2: 135.8 lbs. That's a little better, but still absolutely horrible!!
Here is the commitment part.. I will not eat any breads or breadlike substances, desserts, candy, chips, or caffeine for the rest of the week! wish me luck! lol.
I'm going to be going through some major withdrawals, and it won't be the caffeine. I actually don't have a problem with caffeine. I only have had it a couple times this year, and I started drinking it for the first time in my life last year. I have gone four years of my life without candy, but I'm such an addict now, I don't know if I'll survive a week! Dessert isn't that big of a deal for me either because most of them I don't like. But it's the breads that are going to be my ultimate killer! Carbs are so my weakness!
But no worries, I'm going to do this! and I'm gonna stick to it! Just wait and see! And it will so be worth it in the end! I think the trick to surviving this week will be to have plenty of substitutes around. Here are the foods I'm allowed to eat: fruits, veggies, meat, and dairy. Oh, and lots and lots of water!!! oh ya and sugar-free gum is allowed too!
I'm not too worried about portion control just yet. I just know that I'm going to be having such major withdrawals and cravings that the most important thing this week will be cutting out the "naughty list." After I survive this first week then I'll start adding more rules. But I think.. scratch that.. I know this will be hard enough for me! Wish me luck this week! And I wish you the best of luck with all your goals and aspirations! Luv Ya!